Ambition

I'm not sure I've ever been ambitious. I used to take this as a knock on my work ethic or even my imagination.

I have good friends (looking at you, H) who have known since adolescence what they wanted to "be." Most of them have worked tirelessly, studied and studied, sought out the people with whom they should connect, and have reached these long-set goals.

When asked the perpetual question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I have answered the question in whimsical ways:

Age 4: a ballerina (I have taken one ballet class in my entire life, and I was much more successful at packing my cute bag than taking on first position)

I don't remember having another answer to that question until junior year of high school (when EVERYone and their brother and sister asks you where you're going to college and what you're going to study). I came up with a sophisticated answer, or so I thought, and said I wanted to be an art therapist. Ha, ha, take that inquisitives!

That's not to say that I'm not driven, or passionate, or even, a little over the top. Doing well in school and entering full force into many activities was never the issue for me. And I'd like to think that my career as a communicator and designer is exactly where I belong, full of potential and life-giving opportunities.

Ambition is defined as:

An eager or strong desire to achieve something, such as fame or power.

And perhaps that's where I get caught up.

Ask me to list the 30 places I'd like to travel, and I'll quickly have a scribbled an exciting list to show you. Wondering what experiences I'd like to offer my children? Got that list narrowed down, too! New skills I want to learn? People I want to meet? Yep and yep. I have SO much that I want to accomplish and SO many people that I want to reach out to along the way.

And I've accomplshed many of these hopes and dreams...

But I'm still not sure I'm ambitious.

If I get to any of these goals or positions without the people that I love or the people I have yet to love, I'm pretty sure they'd fail to interest me. I'm not so much an "art for art's sake" kinda gal. Why go to Paris if I can't have my best friend by my side? Why publish a book if I don't have friends who will enjoy reading it?

I guess all this is to say, I think I've settled on the fact that I'm a community gal. If you and I aren't in this together, then where's the fun?

And if it's ambitious to want to meet new people who will teach the unexpected, then I got this.

And if it's ambitious that I live my life surrounded by talented, warm, giving, and curious people...

Well, then maybe I am ambitious.

xoxo, MJ

 


 


 

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